Dinosaurs & Motorcycles

The only thing cooler than hunting with velociraptors on a
motorbike is hunting with velociraptors on motorbikes!

I don't know how Triumph manages it, but they got a Scrambler into most of the scenes that involve chasing dinosaurs in the new Jurassic World flick. We just got back from it today and it's a good time, especially if you've seen the original.

You see Chris Pratt fiddling with the bullet proof fuel injected Scrambler in an early scene, then he breaks it out for the big hunt half way through the film.  The kids in the film point out, "your boyfriend is pretty bad ass!" - well of course he is, he's riding a classically styled form before function bike!

My hair never looked that good,
even when I had some.

So just in case David Beckham riding into the unknown (except for the people who live there - they know about it) on a Triumph Scrambler wasn't enough, you've now got hunting dinosaurs WITH DINOSAURS!

The former might have pegged the hipster meter, but the later turns it up to eleven!



Needless to say, the interwebs couldn't resist, and it didn't take long to get a parody out of it:

I didn't realize I was sitting on a
movie star at the Toronto Bike
Show this year!

The Triumph Scrambler seems to have this magical ability to look like a capable off road bike while weighing over five hundred pounds (handy perhaps if you're riding with dinosaurs).

I'm still looking for my basic dual purpose machine, but I can't say that Triumph's cunning placements don't have be jonesing for a Scrambler, at least until I've had to pick it up out of the dirt a couple of times and discovered that the retro look is also very breakable, then I'd be begging for the two hundred (!) pound lighter and more robust Suzuki I've been longing for, though it wouldn't be nearly so nostalgic and hipster chic.  

I've always gone for function over appearance in my motorbiking, but Chris Pratt on a Scrambler isn't making it easy.

This Month's Wish List

This changes moment to moment, but based on bikes I've actually thrown a leg over, and the shear avalanche of reports on the Ninja H2, I've got a couple of new machines on my wish list.

Sport Tourer:  Honda VFR800

It's a jewel like machine with beautiful finish.  It'll run all day, has a magic variable valve engine, and can corner with the best of them.  It also hits a nostalgic button with me.

$14,500

Bonkers Super Bike:  Kawasaki Ninja H2

A supercharger?  200+ horsepower?  It has wings for godsake!  It's a technological tour-de-force and one of a kind.  I used to be all wobbly over Hayabusas, but the H2 is a daring step in another direction.  It ain't cheap, but it'll be collectable one day.  If I were ever to do Bonneville, this'd be the bike to bring.

$27,500

Off-road ready Dual Sport: CCM 450 Adventure

A light-weight, off-road capable dual sport bike with a bullet-proof BMW engine that can handle everything from actually adventuring off road to long distance travel.  It's the bike that would get me coast to coast to coast in Canada.

$10,000 ?

Wow, that is a well groomed man.

Back To Basics:  Ducati Scrambler

An air cooled single that does the business and reminds you what motorbiking is all about.  Just you and the wind.  It's light, engaging and charismatic.  I'm in even if I do have trouble connecting with the demographic they are aiming at.  Under all the marketing the Scrambler is a lovely little machine that does the business.

Urban Enduro $9995

How to Pick a Project Bike

I'm still wallowing in the sense of satisfaction from taking an old, field-found Concours and putting it back on the road again.  With a road-ready bike in the garage I'm looking for another project bike.  I'm not short on choices, a quick look online revealed a wide variety of 'project' bikes; apparently a lot of people start them and don't finish them.  You can pick up failed projects that run the gamut from boxes of bits to a machine that just needs a bit of TLC.  I'd think you have to feel like a real burk if you bought a bike, dismantled it and then walked away from the mess you made, but people do it.  I'm left wondering if some people start projects just to waste time rather than aiming for a finished product.

Knowing which bike to pick is a big part of selecting a workable project.  The Concours was owned by an older fellow who knew what he was doing and fully intended to ride the bike again.  It wasn't stored properly or used, but the attention paid to it was knowledgeable, making it a good choice for a project.  I was able to hear it running and even rode it home, so I knew what I was getting into.  

The Connie is also a popular bike with a huge online community.  The ZG1000 Concours I have was in production from 1994 up until 2006 and '86 to '93 in a previous, similar generation.  A lengthy production run means lots of parts out there.  I had no trouble finding both new and used parts for it and getting advice was as easy as logging into the Concours Owners Group or referring to the easily found shop manual.

As a starting project the Concours was a good choice.  For my second project I'm looking for a bit more of a challenge.  Just north of me a 1989 Suzuki DR600 Djebel came up for sale, menacingly suggested as a project bike.

The DR600 evolved into the DR650 in 1990.  DR650s are still in production today, but the DR600 was quite a different machine.  After doing some digging on the interwebs I discovered that finding parts for it might be a real problem (one Suzuki dealer said there was no such bike).  There is no shop manual available from any of the usual publishers and the only thing I could find that was close was a photocopied PDF of a 1985 model from a guy in Australia.  The bike was available in continental Europe and Canada, but not the UK or the US, so I'm looking at a long out of production bike that was never sold in the largest market in the world.  This didn't stop me from going up to look at it though.

The DR600 is a huge trailee machine.  The young owner had the ownership, but it was still in the previous owner's name in spite of the bike being in his possession for a couple of years; the project had obviously gone stale.  The amount of rust on fasteners suggested that the bike had been left in the weather for at least some of the time.  It won't run, rust in the tank and fuel system was the diagnosis.  Aftermarket tanks are pretty easy to find for off road bikes (and look very Mondo Enduro), but there are none specifically for the DR600.  A DR650 tank might fit... might.

A non-running machine means you're missing a chance to get a sense of the internal workings.  You're probably walking into a complete engine rebuild if the bike has had rust force fed through it during two years of failed diagnostics.  An unplugged speedo cable and loose, corroded wires also raise questions around the accuracy of the mileage as well as the potential for annoying electrical issues.

I'm looking for a challenge, but the Djebel (an Arabic mountain!) is one I'm too cautious to climb.  If I'm a decade in and have wrenched a lot of bikes, I might have taken a swing at it, but not when the asking price is similar to a ten years newer, running KLR650.  I still had to fight my mechanical sympathy which was tugging at me to take the bike home and make it whole again.

So, I'm still looking for another project bike.  An '81 Honda CB400 came up nearby for half the price of the Suzuki.  Also not running, but a much more popular machine that isn't a problem for parts availability or service manuals.  Stored inside, it looks like a good candidate for my first rebuild.  It also looks like a good choice for a more complicated customization.  A CB400 Scrambler would be a sensible evolutionary step in bike builds for me.

Tragic Emptiness, New Possibilities

...and then there was one.

The Ninja was gone in six days, sold the first weekend I had it up for sale.  If you're looking to move your bike, prep it for spring and wait for the temperatures to promise spring, you'll have a quick sale.

I was asking $3900, but figured it would need some work done to safety, so I had a $500 cushion in there.  It went for $3200 as is, no extra cost on my part.  I'm happy with that, I bought it for $3500 safetied two years ago and put four thousand miles on it.

I've spent the last couple of days putting time into the Concours, getting it ready for launch...

I need to put some miles on this bike so I can begin believing that I can trust it.  I took it around the block today to warm up the final drive before changing out the fluid - that's the last fluid change on the bike, everything is new and synthetic now.

Around the block to warm up the final drive oil, and now it's changed with synthetic.  First time in that new jacket and
helmet too.  Both feel like quality compared to the bargain basement stuff I started with.

I'm still wandering around online looking at a very different second bike.  The KLX250 is on my short list now after seeing that one with a big bore kit.  We did our bike course on Yamaha 250s and I loved how light and flickable they were.  Having a small enduro would be the night and day difference I'd be looking for in having two bikes, not to mention it'd be very cheap to run.  If I had five grand laying about, I'd chuck it at a new one.

I suspect the Concours will need more TLC than the Ninja did, but if it turns out to be pretty bullet proof, a second bike with character could be this interesting '70s Yamaha.  I'd be able to get my scrambler vibe on with that!

There Are These People Called 'Hipsters'

Hipsters with their coiffed hair and well tended beards (even the women)
ride their Scramblers to interesting places

I've been reading the somewhat baffled traditional motorcycle media's reviews of the new Ducati Scrambler. With few exceptions these articles are being written by Baby Boomers who find the idea of "hipsters' to be very mock-worthy. That Ducati is aiming the Scrambler at a younger audience really seems to get up the nose of Boomers, who are used to everything being about them.


Being a Generation Xer I'm skeptical of any kind of social organization and assume nothing is ever about me, but I also find that I have more culturally in common with other people of my generation than I do with any other social distinction (race, class, education, religion, politics, citizenship...). When living in Japan the GenXers we met had so many shared experiences with us that we just fell in together; the times in which you find yourself define you. If you're looking for a review of social organization by birth cohort (generation), then this piece by The Social Librarian will catch you up. See if it doesn't do a decent job of describing your people.

I'm not sure why people can't treat generational differences in the same way they treat cultural differences. You'd be a big jerk if you decided to travel around the world and spent all your time talking about how every other culture is stupid compared to yours, yet people don't seem to hesitate when doing that about other generations. That Baby Boomers, themselves once torn apart in the media because of their newness, are now having a go at hipsters shows just how bad their memories are getting as they age.

At 3:16 you get a good look at how the media

inflamed this situation rather than reporting it

accurately. You'd think Boomers would remember...

As a bald forty something who can't grow a nice beard, I still find that I enjoy hipster bike media even though I could never pull off the look...

If Hipsters make beautiful films and love riding,

then I think I'm a fan...

According to the urban dictionary, hipsters "value independent thinking, counter-culture, progressive politics, an appreciation of art and indie-rock, creativity, intelligence, and witty banter." What's not to like about that?  Unless you're a cranky, old, conservative, Boomer motorcyclist who thinks that the pinnacle of motorcycle evolution is a Harley Fat Boy, you'd have to think it delightful.

Beards, hair product & old bikes...

Hipsters are one of the primary movers of the café racer resurgence. They enjoy looking back before the neo-liberal globalization that Boomers have brought us, I can get into that too.

Given a choice between hanging out with a bunch of Harley Boomers at a Tim Hortons or a group of Hipsters at an artisanal beer bar/gastro-pub, I know where I'd head.


I'm left thinking maybe motorcycle magazines need to diversify their writers instead of hiring all the guys they went to high school with in 1970. Maybe then anyone other than a Boomer might get a fair shake in print. In the meantime, go Ducati, go!  A successful Scrambler means all those traditional, conservative motorcycle magazines will have to update their staff (maybe even hire someone born after 1965!), or face irrelevance.

The world moves on. Enjoy hipsters while they're here, soon enough they'll grow up and sell out like everyone else has (some first-class GenX skepticism there, eh?).

The desperate attempt to pry motorcycles from the well manicured hands of the hipster is ongoing...

Toronto Bike Show 2015

The Toronto Bike Show at the Direct Energy Centre at the CNE was once again a nice day out.  What made it even better was that somehow managed to convince my highly educated, non-biking wife to join us, and she too had a great time.  I'm glad she picked this show as her first.  The TMS is a manufactures' show case, so far fewer pirates and half naked girls and a much more professional presentation.

Here are some pictures from the show... 



The Honda NM4: a bizarre styling exercise that I could get into because it's supposedly based on the bike from Akira... the seating position was so weird and cruisery that I shrugged and walked away.  Would I like to see more anime themed bikes?  You bet, but not if they are ergonomically set up like American cruisers.  

The more bikes I sit on, the more I prefer the good 'ol standard riding position (every tall adventure bike I sat on was awesome) for long distance riding and the sport position for hard riding.  Anything else isn't for riding, it's for preening.

Way to go Toronto Motorcycle Show!  You got my wife out to a motorbike show!  Why would you want her there?  Well, she makes six figures, has two undergrad degrees and a Masters, has a huge social media presence and teaches other teachers how literacy and technology work.  That Indian Motorcycles produced the beautifully modern and yet classical Scout and it caught her attention says good things for the future of the TMS and the Scout!







There are some bikes that just make you go all wobbly.  The Suzuki Hayabusa is one of those for me.  It also happens to be one of the few bikes out there that will get me to one of my bucket list items.  That something this powerful also happens to fit me better than smaller bikes while looking so fantastic makes me think I'd rather be on a Hayabusa rocketing into the future than on the Honda NM4 pretending to.











The Ducati Scrambler.  This bike is supposed to be designed for 'hipsters'.  I'm not sure why preening pretty boys should get dibs on this lovely machine.  The Scrambler is a light, Swiss-army knife of a bike that does what bikes used to do before marketing types decided what you should be doing with them and engineers started designing them only for niches.

The Scrambler feels like a throwback to a time before marketing dictated riding, and I, a forty something bald guy, want to be considered for the ride!












The nearly weightless and astonishingly powerful Ducati Panigale 1299!  It's like putting on fantastic Italian shoes (I guess).

Wow, what a machine!

















What goes where on the Panigale 899.  


















Ducati Diavel... Ducati's idea of a cruiser also appears to be my idea of a cruiser.  This bike fit like a glove, and was stunning as well!

I was surprised at how impactful Ducati was on me this time around.  The Scrambler was magnetic, the Diavel was stunning and the Panigale was otherworldly!  These jewel like machines deserve more attention from me.













The Triumph Bonneville... and some photo-bomber guy.



















The Triumph Speed Triple.  What a beautiful machine!  With Triumph dealers so far away, I'm not feeling able to make the leap to a manufacturer that represents my homeland so well, but I hope to one day!

Like the other big adventure bikes, The BMW GS fits a tall guy nicely.  I'm hard pressed to find other bikes that feel as comfortable and capable as this kind of motorbike.  The Suzuki V-Strom was also a mighty comfortable fit, as was the Kawasaki Versys.











We're two hours in and the little guy is about done... the last bike I sat on, the BMW R9T.  A beautifully put together bike that didn't give me the same charge the Ducati Scrambler did.

I also bumped into Glenn Roberts from Motorcycle Mojo and James Nixon from Cycle Canada.  Glenn has a photographic memory of the hundreds of people he must talk to at these events, remembering the bike I rode from our last chat a year ago!  The talk with James got into how photography isn't the only way to graphically support a story in a magazine.  It was nice to have a few minutes to chat with representatives from my two favourite Canadian motorcycle magazines.

Once again, the Toronto Motorcycle Show was worth the 3 hour round trip down to Toronto.  That it managed to be the focus of a great family day out and also managed to impress my new-to-bike-shows wife puts it in a special category of awesomeness.

We'll be back next year!

Naked Versys Ninja: Riding Many Demo-Bikes

At Kawasaki's Demo-Day last weekend I threw a leg over as many different bikes as I could.  I'm looking for my second bike and I have an opportunity to make a much more educated decision this time, however my expectations didn't always match my riding experience, although with my current crush they exceeded them:

Kawasaki Z1000

As pretty in person and a treat to ride.

I started on a bike I like so much I've got a poster of it up in the garage: the Kawasaki Z1000.  Riding a 1000cc bike spoiled me for the rest of the day.  You can be inattentive with gear changes and the big four just pulls away with turbine like insistence.  The wide bars made handling light and responsive and I didn't find the gearing as twitchy as I've read it is.

The saddle most wanted.

It's not often that someone you're smitten with is as impressive in person, but the Z1000 rides as special as it looks.  It pulls hard, feels wonderfully poised and seems to enjoy moving as much as the rider, it has the same kind of cheerful internal combustion that my Ninja has.

Our 20-30 minute round trip down country roads and through villages put this naked beauty in its glory.  It's a bike for riding not a bike for covering miles at speed, but if you're looking for an interactive riding experience this is it.  As a solo riding machine that puts the focus on the experience, you can't get much better.  It's an emotional as well as a mechanically satisfying ride.  When I've been riding long enough that I can afford to insure one, it'll be on my short list.

Kawasaki Versys

The big Versys with a wonderfully smooth four
cylinder and a very neutral riding position.

I've been curious about the Versus for a while now, it's Kawasaki's all-rounder.  Before taking any out I was talking to the Kawi-rep and he said they get photos of people riding Versys to the ends of the earth, it's a very capable all-round machine.

I'd initially only signed up for a 650cc test ride, but the rep was able to get me onto a VIP ride with the 1000cc, and I'm glad he did.  The big Versys is a tall bike with great wind protection, tall handlebars and comfortable seating position.  Like the Z1000, that big four is turbine smooth and pulls hard at any RPM.  It's an easy bike to ride and doesn't show its weight other than the somewhat awkward ride height.

My 32" inseam just touched the ground but I couldn't flatfoot.  On a bike this tall I'd expect more relaxed geometry in my legs when I'm on the pegs, but they were bent about as much as they are on my Ninja.  Short of getting on a cruiser I'm going to have to assume I'll be folding myself onto most bikes.  If the foot pegs are high enough to allow the bike to lean into corners meaningfully then leg geometry is going to be bent.

The little Versys, a close cousin to my Ninja with
the same engine and many shared parts.

Overall I found the big Versys a nice surprise.  It's only 33 kilos heavier than the 650cc bike and has much more presence, comfort and wind protection.  This would be a bike that could cover long miles with ease, yet is higher off the ground and able to traverse even rough terrain.

I was talking to a rep from Rally Connex Adventure Tours about the Versys and he suggested it wouldn't take much to create a Versys Scrambler.  His main concern was the soft underbelly full of exhaust pipes - with a modified exhaust that runs up the side high on the bike, the Versys might become a real RTW contender.

The little Versys was the one I was keen to try.  It has the same engine as my Ninja, which I think sounds great, is super efficient and offers great power to weight.  I expected a light, quick bike with a more neutral riding position suitable for longer rides.

I was surprised at how rough the little Versys was.  Perhaps I was spoiled by riding the bigger bike first, but on the ride home back on my own Ninja it had none of the buzziness of the 650cc Versys.  The seat was hard and high and the riding position is less leaned over than on the Ninja, but not by much.  When revved it I found a lot of vibration coming back through the handlebars and seat, to the point where I didn't want to rev it and actually stalled it at a traffic light (my only stall of the day).  Perhaps it's a new engine and it hasn't been worked in yet, but the bike I was most curious about was the one I had the least interest in after the ride.  It was uncomfortable, felt under-powered and didn't offer the more relaxed rider geometry that I was hoping for, a real disappointment.

Kawasaki Ninja 300

I would have signed up for a ride on the Ninja 1000 or the ZX-14r, the former because it has gotten good reviews as an athletic all-rounder, the later because it's bonkers and I've got a crush on it, but instead I thought I'd try the Ninja 300 to see what such a wee bike is capable of.  It turns out, quite a lot!  Trying to keep up with everyone else on two to three (to five!) times the displacement was tricky until I figured the bike out.

The little Ninja is unbelievably light and feels a weak until you get half way up the rev range, then that little motor comes to life.  Five minutes in I wasn't letting it drop below seven thousand RPM, and I hit the rev limiter at a stratospheric 13,000 RPM a couple of times before I figured out how to keep it close by the sound of the engine (which is surprisingly smooth and eager).

The wee Ninja is a limited machine, no doubt, but when you wring its neck its also a very entertaining one.  It was nice to end my day of rides with such a pleasant surprise.

There was such a mix of bikes at this demo ride that I'm disappointed that I couldn't try them all.  From the ZX-14r super-bike to something as relaxed as the Vulcan cruiser, I'm more curious than ever as to how all these bikes do the same job differently.  Even up the sports/adventure end of things where I did my riding, the differences in the bikes were astonishing.

As I mentioned before, if you have a chance to do a demo-day, I highly recommend it.  The experiences gained there make finding a bike that suits you a matter of fact and hands-on preference rather than faith and opinion.

Scrambler

I'm enjoying the Ninja and I hope to track day with it this year at some point, but I'm also keen to expand my two wheel experience.  To that end it would be nice to have a bike that is a bit more drop friendly and willing to go off paved road.  In keeping with my '70s heritage I love the idea of a scrambler: an all-rounder that is stripped and ready for everything from road to off it.

Triumph makes a Scrambler model based on 'stripped down desert bikes with high exhausts' (that don't get blocked in dirt, mud and water).  But if you head over to the Triumph page you get the sense that the new Scrambler is more a hipster man purse than a scrambler in the real sense.

I was hooked on adventure bikes but I'm finding them a bit much.  I got an ADV magazine I hadn't seen before recently, and after reading the third straight piece about how adventure touring had produced a mystical understanding of reality I threw up in my mouth.  What used to be a Mondo Enduro style lark has turned into pretentious evangelism.  Why do people always have to fuck up what they love with hyperbole?  A DIY scrambler that I can get muddy and fall off of without worrying about plastic is my latest crush.  The video at the bottom with wacky Auzzies giving it the welly in mud is much more my thing.

Building a scrambler by stripping down a street bike and readying it for anything is an appealing project.  I found a 1986 Yamaha YZ Radian for sale.  The Radian is a naked sport bike with a detuned engine with better mid-range power, ideal for working in less than ideal traction situations.  This particular Radian seems well cared for and is only going for about $1000 (Canadian).

I'd strip off the fenders, shorten the seat to a single, lighten up the bike (which is already pretty light) and swap out the lights for LEDs.  I'd also throw some frame sliders and upgrade the shocks for heavy duty use and cover the fronts with dust covers.  I think I'd keep the cool chrome, analogue instruments.  The muffler would get the high mounted low profile scrambler treatment and last but not least would be some somewhat knobbly tires that would work both on road and off road.

With all those changes I think I could strip the bike down to about the 400lb mark. 

The point of a scrambler is to ride it anywhere and not worry about it.  It hearkens back to days before motorcycles were penned into tiny niches by marketing types more intent on selling a lifestyle choice than a machine you could make your own.  At the very least, it'd be hard for me to make it look like a week long trip has provided me with enlightenment on something so low brow.


Some Scrambler Links:

How to build a scrambler (EXIF)

Aftershock (The Bike Shed)

Aftershock - Sydney from Sydney Cafe Racers on Vimeo.

It's Better In The Wind - Short Film from Scott Toepfer on Vimeo.

Yamaha's FZ-09: the universal bike?

Since having the dream of a stable of bikes mangled thanks to the cruel calculus of insurance companies, I've been thinking about putting my eggs all in one basket.  In looking over this year's offerings one really stands out for me as a bike I could develop a long term relationship with.

What I'm looking for is a bike that offers a standard riding position so it'll take to a variety of riding tasks.  I like the look of a naked bike and I'm a fan of efficiency, so light weight is a must.  So, an all-round naked bike that's light on the scales, fits a big guy well and is dependable so I can make some miles on it.

Fortunately Yamaha has come out with the FZ-09, and it checks a lot of boxes.  At a light-weight 414lbs and with a strong three cylinder engine, it's a step up in power from the Ninja without heading into litre-bike territory.  It's standard riding position offers much less lean and deeper pegs for my too-long legs.

While the 650R is a sport-tourer, it sill puts me into
much more of a crouched riding position.  I enjoy
the bike, but creak when I get off after a long ride. If
I'm carving up corners, it's a beast.  If I'm trying to
make some miles?  Not so much.

An almost 1 inch taller seat, barely any forward lean
(11° less than the Ninja), 4% less bent knees, and
14% less crouch.  An all purpose bike that
fits nicely?  I hope the FZ feels as good as it should.

That 414 lbs means the FZ-09 comes in 26lbs lighter than the Ninja, and it manages to do it while carrying one more cylinder and an additional 200ccs.  The FZ is even 16 lbs lighter than a KLR, which makes me wonder what a scrambler FZ might look like.  With some knobbly tires, wire wheels, longer suspension and guard, there aren't too many places it couldn't go.  RTW on an FZ?  Perhaps!

Is there such a thing as a universal bike, maybe the FZ is it...

And it even comes in orange!

There isn't much I wouldn't do for an athletic red-head...